an article on clothes that are really expensive

Somehow the urge to put this out here just came over me. I have been following fashion month rather as a morning- in -bed -with -cornflakes- ritual and haven’t actually even seen it all but still I wanted to gather my favorite outfits from Fall/Winter 18 on here.

I take fashion shows as a source of inspiration from a world that is quite a little too extra for my taste. I enjoy their over exaggerated cuts and styling as a way of pushing my own way of standing in front of my cupboard every day choosing what exactly to put on my body.

Quite honestly, I have to say, proving all vain fashion blog stereotypes, that the brands I tend to be looking forward to the most are Gucci, Balenciaga , Gosha Rubchinsky, Dior and Chanel. So if one of you is by any means a fashion expert..I’m sorry..this is probably gonna hurt to read.

1. reincarnated Jackie Kennedy from Jupiter (yup, y’all know I’m talking about Moschino) 

I personally am a huge fan of 50s and 60s fashion, so I really enjoyed this colorful and pop art clash between the conservatism of that era and a new alien touch to it. 

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2. cherry bomb

 This category combines androgyny with an unapologetically female status. These are fierce, strong and sometimes quite unattractive looks. All of these outfits are meant to be more than just to be looked at and make its wearer seem appealing. I love the boldness and loudness of these looks and would love to incorporate more of the IDGAF attitude to my wardrobe. 

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Versace (pictures above: YSL, Fendi)

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Marine Serre

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Vetements (this look totally reminded me of something my grandma would wear today, since she still is way more high fashion than I will ever be)

Miu Miu : Runway - Paris Fashion Week Womenswear Fall/Winter 2018/2019

Miu Miu

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Balenciaga (gosh, I love a good creepy runway stare)

3. delicate and fragile insects 

This category is all about pastel colored, delicate fabrics, draped effortlessly around the female body. To me these looks point out the vulnerability of the clothes in contrast to the strong and powerful character of its owner.

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Mulberry

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Jacquemus ( this look reminded me of a grown up Cher Horowitz)

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Chanel ( i love the combination of evening dresses with the only pair of shoes I actually own)

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Gucci ( I really fell in love with the vinyl trend and love this pastel beige take on it)

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Gucci -> I mainly put this in here because of  this video I found on Youtube

4. walking the dog 

As a dog owner I was particularly impressed by the incorporation of practical fabrics and warm, earthy materials. I mean, I get it, don’t take out your dog in totally overpriced sparkly boots, but it’s the fantasy that counts.

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Dior (the collection wasn’t actually my cup of tea, but I feel like this look could easily be adapted from my own wardrobe)

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I call this ” New Moon, howling with your Beagle” it is Givenchy btw

5. Contrasting 

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Balenciaga (Ok, i looove this look! I once bought a red pair of tights and never knew what to do with them until now) 

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Gucci ( the same thing applies here, I really enjoy weirdly patterned tights)

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pretty, disappointed

I wanted to come back on here for quite a while now, but I was weird. I still am, so nothing much has changed, except now I feel like I have something to say, something to share, even if all it is is sad and disappointing. I wanted to share that vulnerability, because I am sitting at home in my room for 2 days and am unbearable to the people outside the door to my room , namely my mom..and actually only my mom (I’m sorry mom, though I never say so). I feel like in order to let go of all these negative feelings is to share them.

I got into university. I thought so at least. In the end I didn’t.

That is actually all of it. If you narrow the issue down to only the most basic facts it never actually sounds so bad. The issue started in a place where I did’t have a spot and ended in a place where still, I didn’t have a spot. Nothing lost, except the idea. It is a little difficult explaining the whole situation in all its necessary details , so I won’t. All you need to know to get that ” uh, shit, totally relate”-feeling is: I wanted something really bad, and didn’t get it, though I worked sort of hard to get there.

It is still only day 2 after receiving the message, so I am still trying to understand and accept in order to start moving on (which hopefully should happen at day 4 or 5 post not getting what I want).

The way to deal with disappointment is easy. You don’t have what you want, get over it. Move on. Nothing great ever happened through being mean and undeniably obnoxious to the people around you just because you didn’t get what you wanted. Disappointment can be a great motor though. It can motivate you to work even harder to get where you wanted to get in the first place. You’ve now experienced where and how things might have gone wrong and can work with that knowledge to improve. At least that is what I am going to do.

There might be multiple paths to reach your goal. This should inspire you to be creative, feel challenged through disappointment.

 

Lebanon Hanover-OOTD- sich verlaufen



“Ich möchte mich mit dir verlaufen, nicht nur Eiskunstlaufen” ( Hall of Ice, ” I want to get lost with you, and not just do figure skating”) is one of the many lines of Lebanon Hanover we shouted into the mob last Saturday. People mostly looked like doppelgänger’s of my mother from the 80s, back when she still had a life worth mentioning, which she makes a regular point reminding me of.

I tried to capture the aesthetic of that evening with my own wardrobe in the following pictures ( since this still aims to be just a fashion blog). But furthermore I’d like to get a little more into my thoughts and feelings of the recent period of time, which oddly does emulate the sense and attitude of that New Wave era.

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Lebanon Hanover in Cologne, taken by a friend of mine who also wrote this amazing german article 

My monthly playlist consists of mostly 80s wave-goth-alien-thecure-vibes , and it followed me along this month sitting at home wondering what’s wrong with my life, making a point to move my ass and see what lies beyond my comfort zone, starting to volunteer at a local youth service, visiting concerts, and perhaps most excitingly acting for a popular TV channel in a crime series.

As I was standing in that white transporter, with a teaser in my hands, in the middle of the night in a forest, a huge camera crew outside that van, waiting for my turn to act out a murder scene, I was holding in for a minute just thinking…what the hell?! September was a month of lingering and the fact that I was standing someplace else than my familiar, suburban supermarket or dog park was just so strange and unexpected. I was doing stuff, I am doing stuff. I’ve met so many new people this month, actually acted along my feeling of being stuck instead of just acknowledging it and feeling sorry for myself and stood in that very transporter waiting to teaser a man and get paid for it, huge TV camera in my face…scary…

I’m not quite sure whether I will keep up with my new found excitement to dare, but it’s nice as long as it lasts. University started again, I’ve passed all my exams and am now hurled back into studying statistics.  It’s always about making the best out of it so I’ve learned. If you’re upset about something, acknowledge it and then find something that stops you from being upset. It sounds super vain, but dramatizing your every move won’t be moving at all.

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S k i r t: Pull& Bear

F i s h n e t  t i g h t s: Carnival shop

B l o u s e: Vero Moda

s c a r f: Zara

E a r i n g s: little boutique in Paris, self-made

s h o e s: Doc Martens

H a t: flea marcet

a meaningful article on a meaningful topic with a meaningful conclusion

What you are reading here is supposed to be the start of a well thought through article on a meaningful subject of my choice I researched extensively and am now going to present to you in bearable bits and pieces, made sure there is not

too

much text, and that I insert enough

paragraphs, since it is very stimulating for the human brain to keep scrolling in search of new

information, for the thrill of feeling achieved, for the thrill of having read something the author so whole heartedly made sure to remind you off, is surely thought through and therefore not a waste

of

precious, precious time. Leaving you in a cognitive dissonance (“the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioural decisions and attitude change.” -Google search the first thing that came up) by telling you that time spent on the internet is a waste in itself , especially since I could just so very

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this caption underlines the point this witty collage is making

spontaneously decide to tell you that really, I have nothing to say at all, leaving you with …nothing… but the realization that ‘argh, fuck that author, I have just been tricked to waste 2 minutes of my precious, precious time on here.’. But that I wouldn’t do. Because

I do

have something to say. In fact I’ve been saying it throughout this little journey of wildly adventurously  spread paragraphs. Maybe you’ve missed it, just there..

there

it

was.

 

time warp – flea market lookbook and how to style doc martens

I recently came across the glorious frenzy of flea market shopping. It was a rather small, suburban one in which older people go to sell all their weird possessions their husband can’t see them wearing anymore or is just old and weird. That is usually the style I seem to opt for so me and the old lady’s always seem to establish a magical bond on these events.

Since I got quite sick the past week, where I made big promises for this blog to become somewhat more than its superficial surface (oops) I really tried to cover up my red nose and go without feeling like dying for a solid 10 minutes to shoot this lookbook ( I know you guys all couldn’t live without) .

Everything is either vintage or my actual grandma’s except for the shoes, those are Doc Martens.
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isn’t it rather pointless?

Audrey’s dance is playing in the background and I salute to everyone who knows what I am referring to fellow black lodgers.

I write to you because I’ve been in a weird mindset these days. The past month I’ve spent studying for my end of term exams for uni. I dedicated all my time to it and hence cut back on social inquiries or just what other people would call ‘life’ in general. Every time I am stuck in that automatic mode of just doing, blacking everything else out I seem to fall into a deep self dug hole of nothingness once exams are over and time is available to be spend in freedom.

It seems silly and a little sad to be calling one out as being overwhelmed by time and possibility up to a point where you just sit and stare and do nothing. Yet this seems to be the exact thing happening to me. I am asking myself, well what is it that is missing, what is it that differs life from existence?!

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Am I not alive sitting at home reading, telling my dog one too many times he’s the absolute cutest? Or is it rather that person sitting in their city apartment planning another night out in a sparkly attire and loop earrings?

When do you exist and when do you start living? It’s a phony and rather childish request but still it’s present.

I’ve been offered a job recently and I took it just to turn it down startled by fear of failure and misery. It really hurled me back in time making me realize I really wasn’t over so many things I thought by now I should be. It’s rather embarrassing to post this on the internet but I just want to be honest with whomever on here (hi!). By now I am still too upset to pull wise words out of this incident.

Today I’ve spent almost the entire day reading ” Amityville Horror”, which satisfies my need of 70s horror stories just right. It may keep me occupied enough for a while, occupied enough to not have to face what’s really bugging me. Isn’t it rather pointless telling you all this? I have a few ideas for this blog which I will try working on in the following weeks…until then the crisp air of Amityville will keep me busy.

i’m not physically naked in this

I would like to see myself driving, driving …just the mode of being in motion, the mode of having things around you seem like a big swirled homogenous something.

In my mind some vintage sounding song is playing. A man strumming his guitar just having a good old soliloquy in form of music. Maybe Joni Mitchel is the man I’m thinking of here…it’s close enough.

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I had a run last week, it was already 9 o’clock, a time I usually spent seated in my own comfort zone watching Grey’s Anatomy ( still hasn’t turned sour to me – note to future self, in retrospective it all looks way nastier than it felt like in the moment). The sun was setting. My dog, who had to be forced out of his basket (cause bad habits align) had to be dragged behind me on his leash. I had a run with him, of course he won, he always does, sat on the bench and watched the sunset whilst eating an apple I just picked from the apple tree nearby. I petted his head.

I was looking down onto my hometown. From way up there one can see the house I grew up in. I like to think back on the times I hustled around in a naive, carefree frenzy during this time of the year, when spending the day lying in a field of gras was the most satisfying feeling I could think of.

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The past few weeks I’ve spent studying for my upcoming exams. I feel blessed and grateful everyday when I look at my anatomy poster thinking about just how miraculously this body of ours is set up and composed. I’m fascinated by the human brain, its power, its endless depth, its mystery, its magic.

Today I’ve learned that Oxytocin, synthesized by n. supraopticus and n. paraventriclaris in the hypothalamus is being transmitted during sex equally in women and men, leading the both of them to connect, amalgamate with one another. Yet no equal feelings in consequence.

It all boils down to chemistry.

Evolutionary Theory suggest men tend to polygamy because it increases their chances of personal fitness ( which is all about distributing as many genes to a next generation as possible), they cheat on you, because they can’t help it. Women need to find a loyal man, cause their chances of getting pregnant are limited and they need someone who stays in order to help with the children.

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It all seems to make sense at least in little ways. Of course there are many more opposing theories to all this, and many more factors play a determining role, but isn’t it comforting to have easy explanations at hand such as these?!

At this point I frankly have no clue why I’m telling you all about this. I should have written all this into a diary, but somehow this felt right.

I’m grateful for all I have. I am grateful for all that life gives me, even though I act so selfish and unfair and probably don’t deserve any of this. In the end, when everything seems so highly complicated, twisted and tangled, there is an explanation to this if you look closely enough. And that in itself is comforting.

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