Lebanon Hanover-OOTD- sich verlaufen



“Ich möchte mich mit dir verlaufen, nicht nur Eiskunstlaufen” ( Hall of Ice, ” I want to get lost with you, and not just do figure skating”) is one of the many lines of Lebanon Hanover we shouted into the mob last Saturday. People mostly looked like doppelgänger’s of my mother from the 80s, back when she still had a life worth mentioning, which she makes a regular point reminding me of.

I tried to capture the aesthetic of that evening with my own wardrobe in the following pictures ( since this still aims to be just a fashion blog). But furthermore I’d like to get a little more into my thoughts and feelings of the recent period of time, which oddly does emulate the sense and attitude of that New Wave era.

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Lebanon Hanover in Cologne, taken by a friend of mine who also wrote this amazing german article 

My monthly playlist consists of mostly 80s wave-goth-alien-thecure-vibes , and it followed me along this month sitting at home wondering what’s wrong with my life, making a point to move my ass and see what lies beyond my comfort zone, starting to volunteer at a local youth service, visiting concerts, and perhaps most excitingly acting for a popular TV channel in a crime series.

As I was standing in that white transporter, with a teaser in my hands, in the middle of the night in a forest, a huge camera crew outside that van, waiting for my turn to act out a murder scene, I was holding in for a minute just thinking…what the hell?! September was a month of lingering and the fact that I was standing someplace else than my familiar, suburban supermarket or dog park was just so strange and unexpected. I was doing stuff, I am doing stuff. I’ve met so many new people this month, actually acted along my feeling of being stuck instead of just acknowledging it and feeling sorry for myself and stood in that very transporter waiting to teaser a man and get paid for it, huge TV camera in my face…scary…

I’m not quite sure whether I will keep up with my new found excitement to dare, but it’s nice as long as it lasts. University started again, I’ve passed all my exams and am now hurled back into studying statistics.  It’s always about making the best out of it so I’ve learned. If you’re upset about something, acknowledge it and then find something that stops you from being upset. It sounds super vain, but dramatizing your every move won’t be moving at all.

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S k i r t: Pull& Bear

F i s h n e t  t i g h t s: Carnival shop

B l o u s e: Vero Moda

s c a r f: Zara

E a r i n g s: little boutique in Paris, self-made

s h o e s: Doc Martens

H a t: flea marcet

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time warp – flea market lookbook and how to style doc martens

I recently came across the glorious frenzy of flea market shopping. It was a rather small, suburban one in which older people go to sell all their weird possessions their husband can’t see them wearing anymore or is just old and weird. That is usually the style I seem to opt for so me and the old lady’s always seem to establish a magical bond on these events.

Since I got quite sick the past week, where I made big promises for this blog to become somewhat more than its superficial surface (oops) I really tried to cover up my red nose and go without feeling like dying for a solid 10 minutes to shoot this lookbook ( I know you guys all couldn’t live without) .

Everything is either vintage or my actual grandma’s except for the shoes, those are Doc Martens.
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an average fashion blog post

As for my current state of mind, it’s wandering. My sense of fashion isn’t really existent at the moment and to be frank, fashion doesn’t bother me much these days (which might be due to the fact that i’m absolutely , terrifyingly broke).

These days I mostly spent my time trying to make believe.

Trying to make believe in terms of cultural heritage, human relations, my emotions and feelings, my actual life. I spare you all the endless and ongoing monologue of me rambling about the lost cause of love in modern age (which I simply refuse to believe is a lost cause).

Instead I’ll indulge in the pleasure of filling this utterly ‘unexciting, superficial, unimportant’ fashion blog with great excitement. Its phoniness and utter uselessness is what made me start one in the first place. Isn’t it nice to have a place where nobody actually even tries to make a point, just ramble, just let all the pretty stimuli drizzle into your brain…?! Fashion can be so much more than that obviously but as I already told you, it’s not for me currently.

So let’s start this picture show you guys came to scroll down on in the first place. Here I’ll basically just post all the input I’ve been saving on my desktop lately. Clothing ideas I am into whenever I feel like dressing up once in a while.

#1 The effortless french person from the 70s and beyonde8cdc509b69efe4f33898f032aff1e09--jane-birkin-style-fashion-hair

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#2 Touch me I’m sick

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#3 mono

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#4 o v e r

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#5 i don’t know how to call this anymore so I’ll just type these words so it doesn’t look like  i am an idiot

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mon coer est fou

 

Last week i had a  particularly strange and ultimately dramatic encounter between Brigitte Bardot, Francoise Hardy or Catherine Denevue and myself.

I cried lying in someone else’s bed. Then I cried in this persons bathtub. It wouldn’t stop. It just happened. It just occurred out of nowhere. This “I’m sad and bored”, this existential lust for love, this ungraspable feeling of lack and longing for more, more, more known from old french films.

This moment reminded me of the bathtub scene in “Le Mémpris”  with Brigitte Bardot. Her whole attitude, her sudden change of mind, her sudden dissatisfaction to real world love and limited access to her “homme ideal”…

Of course it’s been a rediculous attitude of mine and i am totally aware of its cinematic, inauthentic nature, but it just hit heart that night and I’m sure most of us get lost in this hopeless process of hiding away in ideals and illusions from time to time. So this Lookbook is intended to be an homage to those french lovesick girls or just a recollection of my current day to day garment choice.

…with a feeling of wanting more ,  more,  more   in the air …

 

tenue une:

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s k i r t: zara

b l o u s e: flea marcet

s c h o e s: Pleaser

tenue deux:

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s k i r t: Zara

s h i r t: idk stolen from my grandma

c h o k e r: gift ribbon

s h o e s: Pleaser

b a g: flea marcet Buffalo

tenue trois:

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s h i r t: zara

s k i r t: American Apparel

s h o e s: Asos

tenue quatre:

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t o p: vintage out of my mom’s closet

s k i r t: vintage and authentically bought in paris last year

same shoes and choker

Meredith Grey started knitting

I’ve recently fell into a deep hole of spending each and every night in my *not sexy* pajamas, eating ice-cream, watching Grey’s Anatomy, periodically crying for one of those too-nice-and-unreal-to-actually-exist-men on the show (George anyone?!) or hating on the actual main character. I am not pleading on watching this show, although it’s great in a low-key sad way. I’m just saying it’s more than what meets the eye, although organs brains and scalpels really do hit your eye quite often.

It seems as though each and every character is somehow struggling with their own version of feelings rejected by someone très special to them. Each of them is trying their own way of growing out of these old habits of dreaming about someone they may never bound to be with, yet dream about at the very last. One is cutting his hair in a ridiculous way, the other decides to fully ignore the other, dellusionally denying they  are only fooling themselves, and then there is Meredith who started knitting a sweater in order to keep her thoughts on men she can’t have from cursing her mind.

My very own method in addition to Meredith’s very clever approach would be: Look ridiculous…aka …fabulous!

Knitting is a good start actually, but I’ve discovered that the most comforting and confident way to get away from being objectified and looked at as a female in a pretty mini skirt is a) of course owning it and b) just doing the exact opposite from what’s being considered female by taking away shape.

This is not meant to sound like women need to hide their bodies in order to feel safe at all. It’s just, sometimes one doesn’t want to look like that pretty girl guys are looking at just cause she has a nice bum or any type of female attribute for the most part. So this look attempts to be a tiny revolt against the ideal female look but still includes feminine features. Each item could be dressed up individual, but as a whole they create this no-i-actually-didn’t-give-a-fuck-about-how-to-look-ominously-pretty-today.

This is how I feel comfortable lately and just like i can be myself.I’m sure there are multiple ways of feeling just that, so here is my approach on the untouchable femme.

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P a n t s : Zara

S h i r t: made it myself

J a c k e t: Vintage + DIY

S h o e s: Asos

G l a s s e s: H&M